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Understanding
9/11No "Wrong" Partner, Other Moronic Relationship Advice
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- Publication date
- 2022-01-21
- Usage
- Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 4.0 International
- Topics
- intimacy, commitment, personality, hostile, pain, aversion, hurt, approach-avoidance repetition compulsion, fear, phobia, relationship, intimate partner, frustration, advice, tips, self help, past, record, behavior, recidivism, attachment styles, anxiety, dismissive, avoidant, partner, mate, selection, relationships, right, wrong
- Language
- English
- Item Size
- 198.0M
Advice online and in self-help books is often wrong and counterproductive.
Two examples:
There is no such thing as “wrong partner”. Your mate selection is always on point and on target.
If you are a self-loathing and self-trashing masochist - an abusive narcissist is the right partner for you, for one night or for decades.
If you dread intimacy, being vulnerable, and heartbreak - an avoidant-dismissive mate is a match made in heaven. Having a true intimate partner would only enhance your anxiety and amplify your insecurities to the point of paranoia.
If you are thrill-seeking, reckless, and defiant - you gravitate towards psychopaths.
Your attachment style is lifelong (though life goals, choices, and behaviors in relationships can be modified). It makes sure that whoever you may end up with is always the right partner for you.
One of the most moronic bits of politically correct advice online is: “Your partner’s sexual, social, and psychological histories, his or her past, are not relevant and you have no right to inquire about them. Only present choices, decisions, and behaviors matter. Don’t be retroactively jealous!”
Yet, by far the best predictor of future behavior is past behavior. Recidivism - defaulting to past misconduct - is rife.
More than 80% of alcoholics restart drinking within a year from rehab. Almost 70% of criminals repopulate their erstwhile cells. Having cheated once, you are three times as likely to cheat again. Promiscuous women sleep around extradyadically much more often than the regulated, boundaried sort.
By all mean: interrogate a new potential intimate partner to the greatest possible extent. It is your only protection against future nasty surprises.
Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3
Two examples:
There is no such thing as “wrong partner”. Your mate selection is always on point and on target.
If you are a self-loathing and self-trashing masochist - an abusive narcissist is the right partner for you, for one night or for decades.
If you dread intimacy, being vulnerable, and heartbreak - an avoidant-dismissive mate is a match made in heaven. Having a true intimate partner would only enhance your anxiety and amplify your insecurities to the point of paranoia.
If you are thrill-seeking, reckless, and defiant - you gravitate towards psychopaths.
Your attachment style is lifelong (though life goals, choices, and behaviors in relationships can be modified). It makes sure that whoever you may end up with is always the right partner for you.
One of the most moronic bits of politically correct advice online is: “Your partner’s sexual, social, and psychological histories, his or her past, are not relevant and you have no right to inquire about them. Only present choices, decisions, and behaviors matter. Don’t be retroactively jealous!”
Yet, by far the best predictor of future behavior is past behavior. Recidivism - defaulting to past misconduct - is rife.
More than 80% of alcoholics restart drinking within a year from rehab. Almost 70% of criminals repopulate their erstwhile cells. Having cheated once, you are three times as likely to cheat again. Promiscuous women sleep around extradyadically much more often than the regulated, boundaried sort.
By all mean: interrogate a new potential intimate partner to the greatest possible extent. It is your only protection against future nasty surprises.
Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3
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